Bootcamp Week 4 Wrap-up: Major Mental Milestone

I almost puked at bootcamp yesterday.

That would have been a decidedly different milestone, for sure.

Yesterday was circuit testing day, my first.

Several weeks ago I had heard they do this from time to time and I tried to forget about it. It brought back too many bad memories of the Presidential Physical Fitness Test, at which I was a spectacular and consistent failure.

So when I walked into the gym yesterday and saw the following lineup on the whiteboard, my stomach dropped:

100 medicine ball tosses
100 side to side jumps
100 squat jumps
100 crunches
100 Mountain climbers
100 rows
100 military presses
100 straight leg lifts, etc.

I think there were a few more and I blocked them out.

The trainer announced it was testing day. We had the entire class (50 minutes) to complete the lineup, but the object was to race against the clock and do it as quickly as we could. The trainers keep track of our results and we can compare against future testing days to see our progress.

My first thought: I'll never finish. Seriously, 100? Of each?

I had an immediate vision of it being 2 p.m. and I'm still there grinding out squat jumps.

After warmups, the clock started and we were off. I did my 100 medicine ball tosses, then decided it was stupid to do all 100 of everything in a row. So I began alternating between exercises doing, say, 40 squat jumps, then moving on to 50 military presses. I bounced from exercise to exercise, chipping away as best I could while our trainer kept tallies and informed us what we had left.

Amazingly, I was down to about 40 Mountain climbers and 40 military presses when I started feeling nauseous. Not sure if I drank too much water or too little, or was pushing too hard, but I did not feel well. It wasn't 911-puking level, but I was in the neighborhood.

But, with so little left, I was not DNFing it.

I ground out the final reps, gave the trainer a head's-up and saw my time: 35:11. 35:11! I finished.

That's been the most surprising byproduct of bootcamp: Confidence.

I expected great fat burning and muscle-building, but I never anticipated how the classes would boost my confidence.

It seems as if I go into most fitness adventures with the predisposition that I will fail. It's not on purpose, but rather the cumulation of a lifetime's worth of attitudes on this subject.

But lately, since running and bootcamp, I've been really challenging myself and, in turn, surprising myself, too.

It's turned a world of I can't and I won't into I'll try and I will.

In which it's out with the old

For a few weeks I was in clothing purgatory.

I bought new summer clothes in smaller sizes, but my closet and drawers were still jammed with a wardrobe that's now way too big.

Sick of having my closet filled with useless items, I finally made the time to have a therapeutic purging of old threads, tossing everything with a 3X, 2X, 1X, XL, 24, 22, 20, 18 on the label - basically, an entire plus-size section - into trash bags for donation.

I cleaned out most of my closet and drawers. I probably have 1-2 bags of stuff still to clear out from the deep recesses of the closet, but it's nice to have a lot of space back.

I did keep a few pieces of old stuff: A couple pairs of pants and a shirt. I will need them for After pictures. :-D

It's a luxury to not only have all this extra closet and drawer space, but also to be able to pick anything - anything! - and know it will zip, button, cover what it's supposed to, etc.

Is that what regular-size people do? If so, I like it.

In which I share how I got started

In my weight loss not-so-secrets post, Jen commented and asked:

What motivated you to start, and also what kept you going each day?

My start and my motivation are two great topics, but too big for one post. I'll write about starting here and motivation in another post.

Why did I start when I did?

Basically, it was time. My youngest had just turned 1 and the But-I-Just-Had-A-Baby excuse was quickly expiring. I didn't want to be walking her into Kindergarten registration in 3 years and still be a Size 24-26...or, most likely, worse.

Also, my oldest was heading for Kindergarten registration the following year and when she started in Fall 2011, I didn't want to be "the fat mom." Kids are honest and, later, mean. I didn't want her to ever bear the brunt of my weight issues.

I wanted to buck the stereotype of the "Oh, she has three kids and obviously has no time to care for herself."

I just wanted my pride back.

Over 5 years, 3 pregnancies and the ensuing children, I ate whatever I want. I had fun, but paid the price. By summer 2010, no food excited me anymore. I could (and would) eat anything and nothing gave me a charge. That also signaled it was time to make some changes.

People engage in destructive habits because they obviously get something out of it. I was no longer getting anything out of it, just exhaustion and boredom.

Finally, my desire to regain my pride trumped my longing to eat whatever I want and sit on the couch.

In spring 2010, I gave myself until the kids started school in the fall. I would enjoy the whole summer and then rejoin WW when school began.

My family loves amusement parks, so that summer we went to several. Being overweight took its toll: I was crazy hot and sweaty. All the walking, not to mention carriage pushing and childcare, left me really tired.

And, most tellingly, everywhere I looked I saw obese families. Seriously, they were everywhere. Mom: Fat. Dad: Fat. Kids: Fat. I didn't want that for me, or us.

There was no Ah-ha! moment, no horrible picture (although I have plenty of those), no single terrible experience that got me going. It really was the culmination of everything I've written here.

Plus, I want to be around for my family. I was concerned about developing diabetes and I am positive I had sleep apnea, although I wouldn't go to a doctor to be diagnosed. No doctors! How that has changed.

A couple months after I rejoined WW I either read or heard this great statement that puts obesity in perspective and I think of it often, especially if I'm having a tough time:

Obesity is a disease as serious as cancer. But, unlike someone who has cancer, you have all the power to cure yourself.

Imagine walking into any cancer ward and telling the patients, "You want to be cancer-free? Here's what you have to do: Eat healthy and exercise. Do this and you will walk out of here 100% cured."

Can you imagine any cancer patient not doing it? Just like everyone I've lost too many family and friends to cancer, and I can't imagine any of them refusing a sure-fire cure.

Anytime I think something related to weight loss is "hard", I remind myself:

Chemo is hard. Dragging my sorry ass to the gym is not.

I tell myself: Stop feeling sorry for yourself and suck it up. And be damn thankful you can do it at all.

So the way I look at it is I have a disease, and all the smart eating and exercising I do is what I have to do to keep it under control.

Week 33 Weigh-In: Welcome to Onederland

I know weight is just a number at a specific point in time and we all enjoy many victories that have nothing to do with the scale.

But I can't tell you how happy I am to have my weight start with a 1.

Next to Goal (now just 21 lbs away!), Onederland was my second-most sought-after achievement.

If you've ever had your weight start with a 2, you know how much it means to turn that into a 1.

As you can see from my weigh-in booklet above, I was down 3.6 lbs this week. I was very surprised, I didn't expect a lot given last week's WI, so it just proves that after dozens and dozens of weigh-ins throughout my life, I know nothing.

But, this week, that's fine by me. Although, if you look at the last 6-7 WIs on the chart below, it looks like I have a pattern forming.

Regardless, woo hoo!

In which I reveal my weight-loss 'secrets'

That headline is misleading as I don't have any secrets, I'm happy to share what works for me.

But the title, "In which I reveal my weight-loss rules of thumb" is boring.

Many people who haven't seen me in a while ask, "What are you doing?" When I reply "Weight Watchers" they almost always follow up with, "But what are you doing?" As in How are you doing it?

Over time I've developed many Dos and Don'ts that help me. I've divided them up into categories below to make them easier to digest.

I know the minute I hit "Publish Post" I will think of 14 more, so I will update this post as my early-onset Alzheimer's allows and make a note up here so you don't have to reread everything to find the new additions.

Now, my most important piece of advice:

You can do it.

No excuse will hold you back if you want this bad enough. It doesn't matter if you work, don't work, have kids, don't have kids, are married, single, busy, bored, tired, whatever.

We all have commitments, roadblocks, challenges and other problems that can get in our way if we let them.

But, in the end, nothing can stop you, but you.

I don't have any secret formulas, iron-clad willpower or a magic metabolism. If I had the latter two, I would never have been in this situation in the first place, I assure you.

I am nothing special, just a person who is very committed to this goal - safely and healthily doing what it takes to see it through. Some days are easy and some are hard, but I keep pushing through.

If you have any questions, just leave a comment and I'm happy to answer.

Weight Watchers

I follow the Weight Watchers Points+ Plan. Coming from old Points plans, Points+ did take a little getting used to, but I'm convinced its fruits/veg/protein focus is helping me lose weight faster.

I track everything I eat in a Three-Month Tracker. I save my trackers so I can reference them going ahead if need be.

I eat my Daily Points Allowance every day.

I rarely use my extra 49 Weekly Points (maybe once every 4-6 weeks). But if I want to go out to eat, I make sure it's early in my WW week - Tues (my weigh-in day), Wed or Thu, so I have time to work them off. If I have an event on the weekend, I try to make the best choices and keep the sodium low.

On workout days I eat some of my Activity Points. On heavy intensity days, I eat 3-4 APs. Moderate I eat an extra 1-2 APs. Depends on how hungry I am.

I drink between 96 and 128 oz of water a day. I drink it with every meal and ensure I get at least 96 oz in a day (3 refills of my 32-oz water bottle).

I love Diet Coke. It's my only vice left and I drink 2-3 a day. I don't drink coffee, never liked it.

I eat at least 5 servings of fruits and vegetables each day, usually more.

I try to cut down on carbs, and if I want a snack, I try to make it a protein. However, I do eat carbs every day.

I stay for the WW meeting every week.

Weigh-In Day

I wear the same lightweight workout clothes every week to WI: wicking T-shirt, yoga/gym pants (full in winter, capris spring-summer-fall). When they get too big, I buy a smaller size; no need to weigh extra fabric.

My weigh-in is 10 am. I don't eat or drink anything before. You can find me in the meeting room devouring a Luna Protein bar and a Diet Coke just after weigh-in.

Exercise

I eat a Luna Protein bar before a workout (5 Points+). When I get home after, I eat the rest of my breakfast. I need something on my stomach, I can't workout without any fuel.

I work out four times a week (Mon, Wed, Fri, Sun).

I believe in rest days and keep them. I have two back-to-back workouts on Sun/Mon, but my weigh-in is Tuesday, so I consider Monday my "last chance" workout, but it's less intense than M-W-F.

Currently my workouts are Monday (45 mins elliptical); Wednesday & Friday (45 mins bootcamp class); Sunday (45-minute run).

My workouts are early morning, 6 am. It's the only time I can ensure I can get it in with my full focus and without family obligations.

When I started exercising, I did Leslie Sansone DVDs four days a week. They're fantastic for all fitness levels, especially if you're starting out. I still find them challenging if another workout falls through.

Misc.

I never weigh myself at home. I've tried this in the past and I am almost always disappointed, either immediately or on the WW scale on official WI day. My weight fluctuates too much day to day for a home weigh-in to indicate how my week is going.

Also, I worry I would get too caught up in the numbers and throw myself off track. Who knows how much weight I gain or lose day to day? I don't want to know. I stress enough over one official weigh-in, I have no desire to add spot checks.

I won't do anything to lose weight that I wouldn't do to maintain it for the rest of my life.

I won't force myself to eat something I "should" but don't like. For instance, I have never liked bananas. Won't eat them.

I don't eat after 8 pm. Sometimes I don't get dinner until later due to family commitments, so every once in a while I'm eating dinner late, but as a rule of thumb I try to get dinner done before 8 pm.

I try to make Lunch my largest Points meal of the day.

I rarely drink alcohol. I'd rather eat my Points than drink them. This hasn't been too difficult for me as I wasn't a big drinker pre-WW. I swear I have a 12-pack in the basement fridge that's been there for a year. But, if I want a beer, you bet I will drink it and write it down.

I weigh/and or measure all my food on a digital food scale.

I shop a lot at Trader Joe's. They have an amazing selection of Points-friendly food.

Saturday, Sunday and Monday are my three days closest to WI. I am extremely conscious of what I eat and especially on Monday I try to cut down on sodium or anything that would cause me to retain water. You'll never find me eating sushi Sat-Sun-Mon, but it's the first thing I grab after WI Tuesday.

I read many weight-loss blogs. They're wonderful inspiration and offer a lot of great advice, food finds, recipes, etc. Some of my favorites are listed in the right column.

Any area I missed? Specific question? Ask away.

In which I love avocados...too much

I adore avocados and, in turn, guacamole.

I love them too much. It's one of those foods I can't make fresh (although I love to) because I'd eat the whole thing.

So I was pretty happy to hear that Wholly Guacamole makes a 100-calorie snack pack for the willpower-challenged like me. The package contains three, single-serve packets, each 3 Points+.

It's delicious and portion-controlled, two things I appreciate in a food.

It's so good in that I gladly (and embarrassingly) admit to licking the package to ensure I get everything.

If you love guac and can't stop, it's worth your time.

In which it's Easter Sunday run day

Happy Easter!

He is risen. Good triumphs over evil, light over dark, the tomb is empty and the Devil is defeated, thankfully, once more.

And I jammed in my Sunday outdoor run before all the mishegas begins.

It rained all day yesterday and is sunny and humid today, it felt like I was running in Florida (though not as hot, thank goodness).

Very happy I got my run in, now I can enjoy the Reese's Peanut Butter Easter Egg (<---- singular) I've been saving all week. 5 Points+ if you're counting at home.

Will eat my regular breakfast and a good (measured) Easter dinner. I can fit it all in within my daily Points, plus 3-4 APs.

That's why I love Weight Watchers. You can enjoy everything without being deprived, you just have to plan ahead.