In which I talk myself into a good decision

I swear, 99% of my weight-loss/maintenance life is talking myself out of a bad decision and into a better one.

With food, it's almost always the "I want this, but I'm not hungry and don't need it" variety. If I want something - and am hungry - I will have it. I won't deprive myself. However, head hunger is a far tricker foe.

I have these self-dialogues regarding activity, too. For example, this very morning, a designated run day. I got up at 5:30 am, it was pitch black and raining. I ate my breakfast and read the newspaper, listening to the rain hitting the skylights.

When it came time to think about changing, I heard that voice in my head and that set off a mental conversation that went something like this:

"You don't have to run this morning."

Yes, I do. I have a half-marathon in 7 weeks for which I am already behind in my training.

"But, it's raining out."

I have water-repellant clothes. My watch is waterproof and there's a pocket for my Nano, so there will be none of this business.

"Well, it's still dark out."

*checks iPad*

Sunrise is 7:04 am. I have reflective gear. I will not get killed or eaten by a coyote.

"You could run tonight after Keith gets home."

I could, but it would hang over me all day and I will be pissed off all day knowing I should have and could have run this morning instead of wimping out and having to go out later, when I am more tired than I am now. Plus, if I run this morning, I get to eat a bowl of cereal right now to carbo load.

"Wait, there's cereal? What are we waiting for? Let's go."

So I ate my cereal, got dressed, warmed up and headed out. Yes, it rained the whole 3 miles, but I was pretty dry and the temperatures were good (45), so I was not cold. In fact, wearing the light waterproof jacket left me pretty darn hot.

But here's the kicker, while running all of a sudden I remembered: I really like running in the rain. It's the getting-out-there that's the tough part.

Eleanor Roosevelt said something like: "The easiest person to fool is yourself." That is definitely true in my case, sadly before, during and currently after my weight loss.

I'm annoyed I still try to play tricks on myself, but I'm glad I'm getting stronger that fighting them.